Family and Friends

Had a bit of an interesting conversation the other night. I guess even though I had been thinking about where my life was going for a while, this conversation was what made me get into gear and start working on it.

We had a family gathering on the weekend, and our family is extremely close. So they are always good fun. But over the last couple of years, ive been slowly withdrawing from conversations, I dont laugh as much at jokes and just dont feel like myself. And I guess its noticable. My uncle brought this to my attention and said that I just dont seem to have the drive and the spunk I used to. He said how I used to be cheeky and confident, and like being the centre of attention. I was motivated and he mentioned how no matter what I wanted, I could find a way to get it if I put in effort. Whereas now he said I seem to have given up, I dont fight for myself anymore and my confidence has completely gone.

Now I lived with this uncle for around a year when I moved to Sydney, so he knows me very well. And although I knew all of the above, its very different when you hear it from someone else.

I guess a lot of it has to do with the fact I dont really know what to fight for anymore. I used to know what I wanted and knew how to get out and get it. But when you have no idea what you want, theres nothing to fight for. I guess it also has to do with a bit of a weight battle ive had over recent years. After losing a large amount of weight, I proceeded to put it all back on, plus a bit extra which doesnt help.

So, time to put a plan in place. I have always wanted to work in tourism, therefore I have applied for several jobs within resorts. I live in one of the worlds most beautiful tourist locations - Cairns, on the Barrier Reef. So im in a great position to get into work in this field.

On top of this I am thinking about starting a course. Just a craft or hobby, a way of meeting new people and socialising a bit.

Im also eating healthy again. If im going to give my new life 100% I need to be fit and healthy and have my body working for me.

So thats my plan for now. Will let you know how it goes :)